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When I don’t know what to do?

20 May

One of the things I hate about parenting is the not knowing what to do. What to do when your kid isn’t doing the things you want but you’re out of ideas and methods to change their behavior. We go through ups and downs with Jeffrey (as all children do). He’ll go through a particularly fabulous phase before regressing and testing us and our boundaries once again.
Well, we’re at that tumultuous period again and it frustrates me to no end. He’s being disrespectful to his teachers, he’s having accident’s (like 2 or 3 a day) and then lying and saying that he spilled water on himself. We have been particularly crazy of late. Since Easter we have driven out and back to Lake George twice, once to Pittsburgh and I spent an entire week gone for a funeral. But we’re getting back to normal. Finally and he’s just letting his frustration out on us…

Which doesn’t make it any easier. I’m not sure how to deal with it. He does not react well to having things taken away. I don’t mean that we don’t do that but he works much better by earning rewards. You just get WAY better results by asking him to earn a birthday party rather than threatening to take it away. Whatever we’re doing needs to be presented so that he’s earning rather than losing.

And the problem? I guess is that I’m exhausted and I don’t know what things he has up to “earn”.  And I still don’t know what to do when he’s angry and throws himself on the floor instead of talking. I don’t know how to address the accidents so that I’m not making him embarrassed or ashamed of it, but still getting it to stop. We could go and talk to the pediatrician again but I’m pretty sure we’re just going to hear that we’re doing a good job, that he may indeed have aspergers, and that we need to wait longer for a diagnosis, that he’s challenging us and for goodness sake we were JUST there last month.

He’s a good kid. He’s smart and articulate and funny. But he drives me bonkers and I’m just having a hard week of it. I need to vent and I just wish I knew all the answers/

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1 Comment

Posted by on May 20, 2011 in behavior, Jeffrey, parenting

 

One response to “When I don’t know what to do?

  1. Steph

    May 20, 2011 at 8:07 pm

    Even though you don’t have a diagnosis of Asperger’s and that he might not even have the disorder…..what about contacting a Asperger’s support group. Maybe you can find some guidance and support. Just a thought. Hope things get a bit better.

    Miss Ya
    Steph

     

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